A short time gone...things have changed

Funny. I Googled "Short Time Gone" because I was sure that saying was a song,  and what came up was my all time favorite Grateful Dead song "Box of Rain".



So interesting that, no matter the years that pass by, my connection to the Grateful Dead is still there. I will always have a secret desire to be reborn in Haight Ashbury in the 1960's.

Something I find interesting about moving back to Denver is how little, but also how much, has changed in the past year. And how interesting it is to plop myself into the middle of everything during various time periods and to notice what is different and the same.

Take First Friday on Santa Fe Drive. I used to go a lot after Mike died. First Friday events are the one event I could always attend solo and never feel out of place. But three, four, or five years ago they were different...just different. Tonight I went with Dad and we had a great time! But I noticed a few small changes, noticeable enough for me to be caught off guard because I have only been gone a year.

First, there are food trucks. And more food trucks. When I started going to First Fridays, you might hope to see the art and then attempt to eat at El Noa Noa at 8pm if there wasn't a line. Now, you just have to hit up a food truck at any given point in the evening-One will be there. Second, sometimes you could get a head start on First Friday. Start checking out the galleries after getting really good parking around 5 or 5:30. Now, it seems people are parked and ready to peruse way earlier than the 5pm mark. Third...the galleries! It seems they have multiplied, as has the talent. My favorite addition this year is the gallery space with the showing by local Veterans. The one thing I really took to heart after working on the Western Slope is the commitment of those who serve the country. I got to be the social worker for World War 2 and Korean Vets, for goodness sake. Tonight at this gallery, these young men who served in Iraq and Afghanistan were proudly showing their art. I shook hands and thanked them for their service. Truly. No matter how much a pacifist I am and a hater of war, I revere our service folks for what they do for their country and for the likes of people like me. This gallery was an addition I would like to see more of in the future.

A short time gone, things have changed, and I am okay with it all.

A Little Night Away

Over the past 5 years, since Mike has been gone, I have taken a liking to overnights elsewhere. There is something about staying in a hotel, eating out at a really great restaurant, window shopping, and reading in the hotel room that just says, "Soothe the soul." Life has treated me to many opportunities to stay overnight elsewhere, and moving back to Denver is no exception. I am starting my new job on Tuesday, so if I want to indulge a little now is the time. That, and I am sure Mom and Dad wouldn't mind a little time to themselves without their new "roommate" hovering about.

I first considered going to Hotel St. Julien in Boulder, my all time favorite hotel getaway. The price for a room, however, was not in the budget of a new job starter, so I opted again for the Table Mountain Inn in Golden, which does not disappoint. The only thing it needs is a pool or hot tub and it would be, ahem, "Golden". Otherwise, it is a wonderful little Southwest style hotel with a restaurant to match. I stayed here in 2012 around Christmas when I was on break from my MSW program and fell in love with the Southwest decor, friendly staff, and to-die-for menu. There is a fitness center on the 5th floor which allows me to work off whatever dinner or breakfast delicacies there are. And, a number of cute shops within walking distance, where I am headed after writing this blog post.

I started my Golden getaway with a trip to Golden Gate Canyon State Park. I bought a state parks pass when I was in Montrose because I went to Ridgway a lot. Golden Gate is a little different because it is in the canyon and there are many a trail with quick inclines. I drove around and found a few trails where I hiked for a little while, but not too far, though I had my handy walking stick to ward off any mountain lions or coyotes (I read about too many mountain lion-human interactions on the Western Slope, thus the walking stick). It was a beautiful day and really no one around. There was some snow on the higher inclines. I then discovered a few Jeffco open space parks I need to revisit. It was a lot of fun to get to know my own backyard once again, and a relief to realize I don't have to drive 5 hours to find beauty and solitude.

I am getting ready to wander a few shops, and then plan to eat at theTable Mountain Inn restaurant. I have a book club book to finish for Thursday (I can't return to bookclub without having read the book!) and so a relaxing night is indeed in store for me, just as I am finishing a relaxing day.

One of the lakes driving through the park

"Mule Deer Trail"

View from "Panorama Point"

Centennial Cone Park, a Jeffco open space park

Aack! Snow!

View from the inn's balcony

Me, ready for a little hotel R-N-R

All Things Celebratory

I got a job!

I start November 11th as a Client Care Coordinator for a caregiving agency for seniors. It is the best of all worlds for me...some social work, some sales, and some training of staff. I had interviewed with them for an internship for my second year of social work school, but my advisor wanted me to have a more clinical internship so I chose hospice, which indeed was a good choice. Upon moving back, I began thinking of what I wanted to do for work and this job came to mind. I really like the owners and have a good feeling about the staff there, so I called them to see if they had a position open. After 3 interviews, it all came together and I am really excited to work there. The best thing is that the office is  in the Metro area. No more long commutes for me, that is for sure!

We celebrated my move back to Denver on Saturday night at Susan's house. She and Meg threw the party which was done in a lovely way. All said and done there were 20 people there, which was the perfect amount for me to chat with and also for the guests to meet and greet each other. Meg and Susan have been there for me in so many different situations; I love them both very much and count myself one lucky girl to be in their circle.

I feel like I have dove back into life since I moved back. I joined the YMCA-I got a killer deal on a membership while I live at 1260 because my folks belong; that will give me momentum to keep the membership up when I move and have to pay a little more. I have taken some yoga classes and am walking everyday, something that was difficult to do in Montrose along HWY 90; I have been all over the place, it seems, soaking up life. It feels good!

Cheers to being close to having my feet planted firmly under me once again! House hunting will be fun, as the house selling part of things was very stressful. I promised my real estate agent I will be nicer to him this time : )

Cheers to good friends, the love of family, and really being home.

Reverse Culture Shock

Last weekend I met a friend for coffee and breakfast at Whole Foods. I had been back from the Western Slope one week but hadn't been to Whole Foods yet. I got there a little early and wandered around, looking at every little thing. These tiny bouquets of beautiful, fresh flowers...these little bean snacks made of dried pinto beans and spices...the wall of Tom's shoes...a fresh breakfast bar filled with eggs, potatoes and sausages...all the cheeses...the snacks, the produce, the personal care items, the clothing and jewelry...the list is endless. When we sat down after indulging in that breakfast bar and an Earl Grey tea Latte for me and a pastry and coffee for her, I mentioned how overwhelming everything was to me because there was so much choice. She said, "Hmmm...I think you are experiencing reverse culture shock."

I looked up Reverse Culture Shock online and here is what StudyAbroad.com says about the matter:

"In this section you will learn how to learn with reverse culture shock you may experience upon your return to the United States. One of the biggest challenges for students who participate in study abroad programs can be the difficulty in re-adapting to the realities of the United States (otherwise known as re-entry). Many students who studied abroad in the country of their choice went through many changes, re-examining their priorities, their values, and what they think of themselves and the United States"

Okay, so I wasn't returning from living overseas or in another country. But I was returning from living in another culture. Life on the Western Slope is completely different than life in the Denver metro area. Choices of goods and services are few, traffic is almost non-existent, and things close down by 9pm. Your neighbors are not only the people who live in the houses but also their cows, sheep, dogs, horses, goats...it isn't at all like living in an urban environment no matter how "farm to table" or "locally sourced" we try to be in Urbana.

Her statement really resounded because it may have explained how I floated through my first week home, managing all the cars on the road, all the people who seem to be everywhere, and why I also found 3 movies to hunker into that first week or so where the dark of the movie theater and some solitude while watching a movie seemed comforting. Lucky for me, my reverse culture shock was nothing like the culture shock I experienced when Mike and I traveled alone through Prague. I just remember after a day of all the people, all the different foods and goods, and all the signs that didn't make sense whatsoever, a deep feeling of anxiety set in for a little while. That feeling of, "I have no idea where I am, I can't speak the language, and the walls of all these people from all over the world are closing in on me."

Lucky for me, my culture shock was reversed because I was readjusting to what is familiar, what I have known all my life, and to what I just left only a little over a year ago. What is enjoyable about reverse culture shock is that I get to rediscover all my favorite places, and go to all the new places that have cropped up since I moved. The other day, Mom and I went into Trader Joe's. I hadn't been to the ones built in the Denver area yet, and it was pure delight. Likewise, another "lucky for me" is that, while living in my country house in Montrose, I spent a lot of time alone, cultivating present-ness and doing some meditation. This has given me a sense of inner peace, that when in the past I may have been overwhelmed by chaos, I can now sit in the chaos and feel at peace in it.  Reverse culture shock, and my cultivation of inner peacefulness, is allowing me to see all the things that may seem a part of the daily grind in a new light and is allowing me to be present in the moment of experiencing whatever it is I am doing, seeing, touching, or tasting. I know that soon, after I get a job and into a routine, things will become a part of my daily grind once again, but I hope to experience that present-ness even with things I do a million times or with things that seem mundane. I found this quote recently and it perfectly encapsulates how I have been feeling about life these days:

"I still find each day too short for 

all the thoughts I want to think, 

all the walks I want to take, 

all the books I want to read, 

and all the friends I want to see".

John Burroughs

Recipe for Slow Cooker Chicken Green Chile

Over the past few years, I have begun a love affair with cooking. I had always had a love affair with eating, but my love affair with cooking has developed slowly over time. When I lived in Montrose it really developed because there weren't always things to do, so often I would come home and cook a meal I discovered either in a cookbook, from online, or one of my favorite cooking shows. When I was talking to Mom and Dad about moving in, I asked if I could make dinner every so often since I like to cook. They thought this was a fine idea. Last Sunday Mom and I went to the Pearl St farmer's market and I bought some freshly roasted green chiles. I bought onions, red peppers, green peppers and decided to make a green chile and chicken stew. It turned out so good I thought I would share it here!

Bring out your slow cooker
1tsp olive oil
1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breasts
1 bag freshly roasted green chiles, mild, medium or hot-clean off as much or as little of the outside dark roasted parts you would like and slice and dice
1 large yellow onion, diced
1 large green pepper-seeded, sliced and diced
1 large red pepper-seeded, sliced and diced
3 celery stalks, chopped into small pieces
2 carrots, sliced and chopped into small pieces
3 heads of garlic, finely chopped
1 can chicken broth
1 tsp Cumin seed
Salt and Pepper
The juice from 1 can of RoTel tomatoes, your choice of spiciness
Fresh Cilantro leaves chopped-however much to your liking
2 tblsp Fresh Marjoram, finely chopped
2 tblsp Fresh Thyme, finely chopped
1 cup shredded Queso Fresco
2 cups white rice, cooked to your liking
Garlic Bread (optional)

1) Dice the chicken breasts into very small pieces
2) Heat a non stick skillet with the oil over medium high heat. Add the chicken breasts and garlic; season with salt and pepper; brown these in the oil for 3-5 minutes. Add to slow cooker.
3) In the same skillet and another tsp of olive oil and lightly brown the onion, peppers, celery, and carrots. Season with salt and pepper; Add those into the slow cooker.
4) Add the green chiles to the slow cooker
5) Add the can of chicken broth and the juice from the RoTel tomatoes. Add the cumin seed and stir everything together. Heat in the slow cooker on low for 8 hours.
6) Add cilantro, majoram, and thyme. Stir and heat for another 10 minutes.

Serve over the rice and with garlic bread. Sprinkle as much cheese on top as you wish! I also took the tomatoes from the RoTel can and mixed them with black beans, lettuce leaves, cilantro and corn for a little salad.

Enjoy!

Week One

I am finishing up my first week tucked in all nicely at my parents house. We celebrated with a dinner of White Hots from Rochester, NY-Mom's hometown-Aunt Sheila's macaroni salad, my roasted potatoes, fresh green beans from the farmer's market this morning, and watching some Sunday night football. The week went by pretty relaxed. I walked every morning, saw some friends, watched a few movies, shopped at the mall, and slept in. This week I will get more into a schedule, waking a little earlier and start looking for a job. I don't want to get too involved yet with job hunting because I may have a job at a caregiving company assisting prospective clients. They don't actually have the position available but are considering creating one, so we are in "talks." I have to say, I have little to no homesickness for the Western Slope. It feels good being back in the thick of things, and I am enjoying the opportunity to spend time with the people I love.

Did I ever leave?

I moved back to Denver this weekend. I think I recall when I moved to the Western Slope I said something like, "I am never moving back to Denver."Okay, rub it in for just a second....There. Now I get my dignity back. A friend emailed me the other day and said to me, "Don't consider moving back a failure, Mel..."and quite honestly...I don't. A year later and a lot wiser, I actually consider moving back to be a success.

One thing I learned about myself is that it took a long time for me to grieve Mike. I learned this while I ran the grief group at HopeWest Hospice. While I tried to fight the grief for a long time, once I got to know the men and women who grieved their spouses I suppose I was able to "normalize" my grief with their experiences. Moving to Montrose was a way for me to come to terms with everything in my life-who I am, what I love, who I love, and what "home" means to me. I was able to ponder and write and do art around everything I needed to reconcile. I had the opportunity to do this in a quiet home with beautiful views and time on my hands. Before running the grief group, I didn't personally understand what "resolving your grief" really meant. After running the group and being able to spend a quiet year in the country I do, and actually feel quite resolved.

Now it is onto the next journey, the chapter or phase...whatever you prefer to call change and choice. I no longer identify so much with "What I do" for a living but now identify with who I am as a person. Someone who has found that my own personal truth was right under my nose the whole time. I am a person who loves to love, and loves to love the people I love, and having them around me is more important than attempting new adventures all alone. I love life. I love to do things. I love the synergy of the hustle and bustle, the choices that are available of things to eat, see, do, explore. My heart is full once again with the thought of being a part of the very things I left behind.

I decided to resurrect this blog and continue writing about my life's adventures here, but if you would like to revisit my life's adventures on the Western Slope you can at this blog:

City Girl to the Western Slope

I have no regrets; rather, I have been filled with the most beautiful and wonderful experiences a person can have. I soaked in hot springs; I walked new trails; I saw incredible sunrises, sunsets, and lunar eclipses; I stared at the Milky Way; I watched deer in the dawn light; I met amazing rural people who let me into their lives and hearts; I shared the gifts of the Western Slope with family and friends. Regrets are for the weak of heart, for those who wish they did something different because they can't face the choices they make. I know I am strong of heart, and accept that the choices I make only add to my strength as a person.

Cheers to the easy decisions as well as the tough choices. Cheers to choosing love.

XO Mel