2008 was an important year
for my late husband Mike and me. That is the year we caucused for Obama and
were alternates at the Democratic National Convention in Denver. It was the
year we went to Paris. The year we hosted Thanksgiving for the first time in our
home. And it was the year right before the worst year of our lives, 2009, when
cancer came ravaging back and took no mercy on Mike’s being, no matter how much
hope we had that it was just another bump along the cancer road.
I think about hope a lot. I
wrote about it recently for Soulful Transitions. I believe in hope, although I have found myself after
Mike died facing numerous times of wanting to give up. The hope that was
instilled in me came from believing in a President who has class, cared about
all people, held himself with dignity and yet had silly charm. He could play a
game of pick up basketball, could admit he smoked a cigarette or two, and graciously
took questions from the media even when they made him uncomfortable. His family
showed hope to millions, that people could see themselves reflected in the
color of their skin and in the values they hold as a family.
I also was instilled with
hope when seeing my husband fight with all the will he had to live. He engaged
in procedures that would make the rest of us squirm. I told him one day I
probably wouldn’t be as brave as he was doing half the procedures and taking
half the medications he was doing and taking. He said, “yes you would. You
would want to live. You would do it for me, if nothing else.” Having him say
that to me made me take pause and appreciate the possibilities hope can
provide.
To those of you out there
who continue to say that those of us against the new Administration are a bunch
of cry babies, I would like to disagree. Those of us who have hope for the kind
of better world we have hope in...civil and human rights of all people,
peace rather than war, dialogue rather than demagogue, communities that respect
all people no matter our differences, the right for women to be in charge of
their own health care, etc....we didn’t come to these desires because we are
babies and like to whine. We came to them because we have seen discrimination;
have had our own female health experiences; have fought against an unyielding
health care system; have seen our friends and neighbors, and have experienced
ourselves, misogyny, hate incidents and discrimination. Yet we wake up every
day. And we get to what needs to be getting done. That isn’t the work of
whiners....it is the work of people with strength, character, good intentions,
love and...yes...hope.
Today I ushered in the Trump
Administration with my friend Rosa by spending it with around 20 women who
donated their time, money, toiletries, food, water, socks, chapsticks, kleenex
etc. to put together over 200 bags to give to the homeless on the streets, to
the Comitis Center shelter and to Gateway Women’s Shelter. We methodically
stuffed baggies, broke down boxes, filled up cars and drove these donations to
their respected places. I wouldn’t have had expected to be a part of this
peaceful transfer of power in any other way except in a beautiful and accepting
community. Tomorrow I will march in the Women’s March on Denver, not because I
am whining but because I have hope. I have hope that despite the ideological
differences our country can be united. I have hope that people can see the
intrinsic value in each face they come across. I have hope that I can sit down
with someone who doesn’t agree with me and have a civil conversation to
discover what we can agree upon. I have hope that each of us become positive
examples of civility, care and community to a President who chooses to dismiss
people who disagree with him. So, no, my friends. I am not whining. I am
actually pretty clear, confident, and ready to be who I am in this world to
make positive, accessible and inspiring change-not restrictive, inaccessible
and defense driven change. Who do you choose to be during this time?
