I went for a walk with a friend last week and she asked if I make New Year's resolutions. I used to...I will lose 10 lbs, start a yoga class, etc...but I never actually attained the resolutions I made. I have actually resolved to some basics...I hope 2009 is better than 2008, bringing me more satisfaction and contentment; I hope to travel in 2009; I wish for good health, not only for me but for Mike, my family and my friends. These are pretty basic, and hopefully not too much to wish for.
2008 has been a great year, although it is ending pretty badly. We went on numerous trips...San Diego, San Francisco, and Paris. I had a pretty nice summer in the garden, joining a garden club and meeting some very garden savvy people. We threw a few get togethers with friends and family which is always meaningful. A president of hope has been elected to hopefully improve this ailing country. I reached a few goals with regards to teaching at Regis and in the community. Mike's cancer continues to be at rest. The end, though, I could do without. Two hospitalizations in a month of my beloved Mike and still questions on the reasons. I hope 2009 will bring answers to these questions.
To my friends and family...I wish for you a happy New Year's celebration and a healthy 2009. Mike and I both send our love.
Fall
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Christmas came and went
Christmas came and went, and New Year's will come and go. Quite frankly, I am glad. No offense to family and friends who love this time of year, getting together and having a good time...with Mike's sickness and all I just wanted "the most wonderful time of the year" to be gone. The problem with Christmas is that you can't escape it when you want. It isn't like a bad movie, where you can just walk out; a fight with a loved one where you can go to a room and close the door; a diet where you have to slam the fridge shut to get away from the foods calling out to be eaten. Nope...when you want to shut Christmas out you just can't. You have to grin and bear it. I know, this sounds so Bah Humbug and I really do enjoy aspects of the season. Of course, being with friends and family is special regardless of the holiday. Certain traditions are meaningful; I love Christmas decorations and holiday inspired houses. I guess the Bah Humbug comes from Mike's sickness and knowing that he couldn't enjoy all these things with me. We couldn't do our annual Christmas Eve candlelight mass, we never did drive by the city and county building, and we had to cut time with family and friends short. These sacrifices made the most wonderful time of the year a little harder.
Hopefully Mike is on the mend. He still didn't feel well this weekend, but my hypothesis is that he is expelling toxins now and so everything is coming to the surface. Hey, I am not a doctor but I play one on television!
As for me...I am starting 2 of the teaching gigs I wrote about so long ago. The first is the adult conflict and anger management class at The Conflict Center...that starts on Jan 5th-I will be co-teaching with an awesome woman named Vickie. Starting Jan 15th I will be working on an internship with a great teacher named Ronnie so I can finally teach at Regis. These are exciting endeavors and I will look forward to doing something other than than puzzles, laundry and watching television.
Keep your good thoughts and prayers out there for Mike...may his misery subside and he can feel normal again.
Hopefully Mike is on the mend. He still didn't feel well this weekend, but my hypothesis is that he is expelling toxins now and so everything is coming to the surface. Hey, I am not a doctor but I play one on television!
As for me...I am starting 2 of the teaching gigs I wrote about so long ago. The first is the adult conflict and anger management class at The Conflict Center...that starts on Jan 5th-I will be co-teaching with an awesome woman named Vickie. Starting Jan 15th I will be working on an internship with a great teacher named Ronnie so I can finally teach at Regis. These are exciting endeavors and I will look forward to doing something other than than puzzles, laundry and watching television.
Keep your good thoughts and prayers out there for Mike...may his misery subside and he can feel normal again.
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Monday, December 22, 2008
Silent Night
Yesterday my colleague Teresa and I volunteered at the 27th annual Father Woody Christmas Party at the Sheraton downtown. Father Woody was a priest who co-founded the Samaritan House, and he was also an alumnus of Regis College. Over 2,000 individuals and families were expected to come to the party for a warm meal and Christmas presents. I think there were two volunteers to every family volunteering yesterday!
Teresa and I spent time in the greeting area as people were waiting to be escorted into the ballroom. We even braved it and joined the volunteers singing carols. A compelling moment was when we were singing (very off key I am sure) and the guests were listening to us and clapping. The most compelling was when we sang Silent Night and I watched the faces of two homeless men in particular, staring intently at us and singing quietly along. I was inspired by this...that these men (and others in the group) may have nothing to their name but they do have their faith, which no one can take away. The moment brought tears to my eyes.
Update on Mike-He is doing better than this time last week for sure. He is still swollen in his ankles and feet and we are in the process of figuring this mystery out. We have been putting a puzzle together which has been really fun. I am sure he is looking forward to Christmas where he can get out of the and house and be in the love of family for a few hours.
Teresa and I spent time in the greeting area as people were waiting to be escorted into the ballroom. We even braved it and joined the volunteers singing carols. A compelling moment was when we were singing (very off key I am sure) and the guests were listening to us and clapping. The most compelling was when we sang Silent Night and I watched the faces of two homeless men in particular, staring intently at us and singing quietly along. I was inspired by this...that these men (and others in the group) may have nothing to their name but they do have their faith, which no one can take away. The moment brought tears to my eyes.
Update on Mike-He is doing better than this time last week for sure. He is still swollen in his ankles and feet and we are in the process of figuring this mystery out. We have been putting a puzzle together which has been really fun. I am sure he is looking forward to Christmas where he can get out of the and house and be in the love of family for a few hours.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
He's Home!
Mike is home! He is so glad to be...one day in the hospital is one day too long, let along two or three.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Two weeks too long
It has been some time since I wrote. Mike has been very sick and I don't have the energy to blog. Tonight I do, as I have been doing follow up emails since the trip to the hospital.
Yes...the hospital. Mike was admitted to the ER on Monday with many strange symptoms...an increased heart rate, swelling, fever, chills, low oxygen, you name it. They diagnosed him with pneumonia and he is hospitalized, at this point for an indefinite amount of time.
His illness has made me reflect on the meaning of Christmas. I (we) have given up many obligatory and not obligatory but desired Christmas activities. This Christmas, honestly, I don't want to even think or deal with these activities. I just want him home. Home with a house that is lit up by a Christmas tree. Home where I can give him those damned sheep skin slippers and they actually fit his feet (I gave him an early present only to find at this time they don't fit). I want to cozy up at my parent's place with a glass of wine and yummy food on the mind. I honestly don't care about gifts...I just want my family and my Mike. My friends...well...I am planning to throw a well deserved birthday party so I will see you all then (except for a select few where I will talk to you before February!).
The small things give me joy. Driving home from the hospital, Washington street homes are all lit up. I revel in the kindness of the nurses and doctors at PSL. The calls and emails from family and friends letting us know Mike is in their thoughts and prayers. A good glass of wine after a long day and a good night's sleep with Ches and Stan by my side...literally. I just want Mike home, though, regardless of the season or holiday. I miss him.
Who knows when that will be. No definitive answers are given, just more tests, blood work, pillows for the feet, antibiotics. Soon, he will be restless. For now, though, I am glad he is there and not here...nothing helped him here. Except for the love of a wife, a dog named Chester and a dog named Stan.
Yes...the hospital. Mike was admitted to the ER on Monday with many strange symptoms...an increased heart rate, swelling, fever, chills, low oxygen, you name it. They diagnosed him with pneumonia and he is hospitalized, at this point for an indefinite amount of time.
His illness has made me reflect on the meaning of Christmas. I (we) have given up many obligatory and not obligatory but desired Christmas activities. This Christmas, honestly, I don't want to even think or deal with these activities. I just want him home. Home with a house that is lit up by a Christmas tree. Home where I can give him those damned sheep skin slippers and they actually fit his feet (I gave him an early present only to find at this time they don't fit). I want to cozy up at my parent's place with a glass of wine and yummy food on the mind. I honestly don't care about gifts...I just want my family and my Mike. My friends...well...I am planning to throw a well deserved birthday party so I will see you all then (except for a select few where I will talk to you before February!).
The small things give me joy. Driving home from the hospital, Washington street homes are all lit up. I revel in the kindness of the nurses and doctors at PSL. The calls and emails from family and friends letting us know Mike is in their thoughts and prayers. A good glass of wine after a long day and a good night's sleep with Ches and Stan by my side...literally. I just want Mike home, though, regardless of the season or holiday. I miss him.
Who knows when that will be. No definitive answers are given, just more tests, blood work, pillows for the feet, antibiotics. Soon, he will be restless. For now, though, I am glad he is there and not here...nothing helped him here. Except for the love of a wife, a dog named Chester and a dog named Stan.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Cool stuff
I think it might fun to list some things I think of as "cool stuff". I don't know, I have been out of blog topics lately, okay!
1. Anything bought at 10,000 Villages in Cherry Creek North-It is a Fair Trade shop and there is so much cool stuff!
2. Any book by Augusten Burroughs. I have become somewhat obsessed with his life (warning...it is pretty disturbing stuff!)
http://www.augusten.com/html/index.php/Augusten-Books/Sellevision.html
3. This sweater I bought at Anthropologie. I would wear it everyday if I could!
4. My Colorado Public Radio coffee mug
5. Pandora Radio Station-You can create all these different "stations" where they play similar music by different artists...all for free!
http://www.pandora.com
1. Anything bought at 10,000 Villages in Cherry Creek North-It is a Fair Trade shop and there is so much cool stuff!
2. Any book by Augusten Burroughs. I have become somewhat obsessed with his life (warning...it is pretty disturbing stuff!)
http://www.augusten.com/html/index.php/Augusten-Books/Sellevision.html
3. This sweater I bought at Anthropologie. I would wear it everyday if I could!
4. My Colorado Public Radio coffee mug
5. Pandora Radio Station-You can create all these different "stations" where they play similar music by different artists...all for free!
http://www.pandora.com
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Light
I have been giving thought to why this time of year is so special. I think one aspect that makes it so is the lights that people hang. I have been deliberately driving down side streets to look at the lights on my way home from work. The metaphor for this time of year is that in darkness there is light. Somehow, somplace there is light. You may not know it at the time, but the light is there. I wish we kept white lights glowing all winter, not just for Christmas decorations. Wouldn't that be pretty? If everyone had white lights hanging from houses or trees during the deepest, darkest months of the year.
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