The Yin and the Yang

It was a realization I had last week, after hearing about the mass shootings in Newtown of children. It is the realization that no matter how hard we try as a society to envelop the world in “Christmas Spirit” and being festive, loving and giving to all mankind, we can’t escape the realities of humanity. I got to thinking about how the holidays (or the time from Thanksgiving to New Year’s Day) is really a compact experience of life at its most impactful…the yin and the yang. During this time, the yin and yang are magnified. Feelings are felt stronger during this time. Happiness is incredibly happy…all the food and friends and festive outings. The music, the holiday plays and events, the lights, the gifts you give to people you love most and to those who you may not even talk to much the rest of the year. On the flip side, the sadness is, well, incredibly sad. A Christmas where a child anticipating the day is suddenly dead…Where people who are facing end-of-life realize this is their last Christmas…and people who have experienced loss grieve it all over again. Not to mention that if you are not Christian, you are reminded every day (on the radio, in stores and as you drive home from work) that you are a part of a minority (which can be intimidating and rightly so). I am not writing this to be the Debbie Downer of the moment, or, as we say in holiday-speak “The Grinch”-I am writing this to acknowledge that humanity and the life we all lead is multifaceted. The idea that really keeps me on my toes is that we can’t know the love, the good, the happiness if we don’t know the bad. If everything was good and happy all of the time then we would be robots. And while a future of humans becoming robots is not too far off (and maybe we are, already), I prefer the yin and the yang. I prefer feeling the pain and also the good. Because I know, then, when the good is happening, and what it feels like. And I know that the next round of pain will be followed by the good. The family of that dead child is getting more support and love than many of us put together. That patient who realized this was their last Christmas is reconciling with a family member whom he/she has hurt. That non-Christian can validate his/her belief system more being in the minority and with the support of those in his or her community. What better alchemy than that? I just don’t think the Christmas spirit is all about a time for “charity”…I think it is all about tapping into the yin and the yang that we all have in our own lives and recognizing that the yin and the yang are universal for us all.