I came across this quote today, and it is too beautiful not to share:
“With my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for you. I hope it’s a cold day, so you can see what you meant to me.
” - Jarod Kintz
Fall
Monday, February 16, 2015
Sunday, February 15, 2015
My beauties; Greyhound and an Orchid
I threw myself a small birthday gathering to celebrate the last year in my 30th decade. Nothing to write home about, just a little birthday brunch with a smattering of the most beautiful women in Colorado.
My favorite part of the brunch was centered around the question "How do you know Melanie?" My beautiful friends don't all run in the same circles, and some met today for the first time. We had so much fun telling stories from all walks, and we acknowledged that we all have a thread that brings us together....our amazing-ness. Even if I do say so myself!
Jill was spontaneous and asked if I wanted to go to a movie later, to which I said "Yes!" We saw "The Imitation Game" and I don't have a tear left in my ducts. Walking away from that movie, the stronger my lack of tolerance for intolerance washed all over me. I went from a lovely gathering of amazing women who connected to watching a movie about an amazing man who was the victim of other people's judgements. I have begun to have little to no tolerance for accepting the viewpoints of people who have not walked in another's shoes. And my heart just beats stronger for those people who persevere despite adversity. You go, people!
My heart is opening for a 4-legged. My job at Sacred Heart House has given me a lot of peace regarding worrying around the future of my work life, but this worry also worked its way into my thinking about a companion. Now that I have the job, a companion is next in the equation of life satisfaction. I started considering the right kind of dog and came across the Colorado Greyhound Rescue. I learned that the breed are "couch potatoes" and "gentle giants" and sleep, let's just say, a lot. Perfect for condo living, their demeanor is calm, cool and collected in most cases (except off leash non fenced in, where seeing a squirrel could mean trouble). I went to a meet and greet the other day and met some beautiful hounds. I filled out an application and have a home visit scheduled on Thursday. Once that goes well, I could have my new companion in a month or so, hopefully after I get back from Arizona at the end of March.
The other day, I had a really interesting realization. There is a similarity to me between a Greyhound and an orchid. Mom, Dad and I went to the orchid showcase at Denver Botanic Gardens recently, and there is a similarity there I can't quite place my finger on. The beauty? The gracefulness? The importance of loving care and attention? The thin-ness of the figure and delicacy of the features? I am not sure, but I see the two being related somehow.
Jill was spontaneous and asked if I wanted to go to a movie later, to which I said "Yes!" We saw "The Imitation Game" and I don't have a tear left in my ducts. Walking away from that movie, the stronger my lack of tolerance for intolerance washed all over me. I went from a lovely gathering of amazing women who connected to watching a movie about an amazing man who was the victim of other people's judgements. I have begun to have little to no tolerance for accepting the viewpoints of people who have not walked in another's shoes. And my heart just beats stronger for those people who persevere despite adversity. You go, people!
My heart is opening for a 4-legged. My job at Sacred Heart House has given me a lot of peace regarding worrying around the future of my work life, but this worry also worked its way into my thinking about a companion. Now that I have the job, a companion is next in the equation of life satisfaction. I started considering the right kind of dog and came across the Colorado Greyhound Rescue. I learned that the breed are "couch potatoes" and "gentle giants" and sleep, let's just say, a lot. Perfect for condo living, their demeanor is calm, cool and collected in most cases (except off leash non fenced in, where seeing a squirrel could mean trouble). I went to a meet and greet the other day and met some beautiful hounds. I filled out an application and have a home visit scheduled on Thursday. Once that goes well, I could have my new companion in a month or so, hopefully after I get back from Arizona at the end of March.
The other day, I had a really interesting realization. There is a similarity to me between a Greyhound and an orchid. Mom, Dad and I went to the orchid showcase at Denver Botanic Gardens recently, and there is a similarity there I can't quite place my finger on. The beauty? The gracefulness? The importance of loving care and attention? The thin-ness of the figure and delicacy of the features? I am not sure, but I see the two being related somehow.
Friday, February 13, 2015
39
Well, my 39th birthday came and went. Every day is a day closer to 40. However, I think 40 is going to my decade! I hear good things about the 40's. I celebrated the last year in the 30's pretty simply. It was a beautiful day and so I drove to Barr Lake State Park for a little adventure. Driving out East reminded me of how much I do like being in "the country" with the open spaces and the farm animals. I will have to drive that way again this spring to see all the babies getting born. I remember what a special experience that was when I lived in Montrose. I had never been to this park before and it was nice and peaceful. There is a wildlife refuge and I saw a hawk circling the sky-gliding so peacefully. I enjoyed the sparse feeling of the park in winter.
I went to Williams and Sonoma and bought a beautiful Le Creuset baking dish with some Christmas gift cards, and then got my car thoroughly washed with another gift card to the car wash. Mom, Dad and Robert took me to my favorite Mexican food restaurant La Loma and then we had brownies, cookies and ice cream at the house. I stayed the night, so put on my jammies and we watched some television together.
This weekend I am celebrating with my friends at a birthday brunch I am hosting. I wanted to do something, but nothing too extravegent, so I think it is the perfect way to celebrate.
I did get a job, so another 10 before 40 is completed. I am working as a program assistant at Sacred Heart House, a women's/kids shelter downtown. My job is really diverse, and is going to keep me very busy. I manage volunteers and support the women in the "Follow Up Program" who have moved out of the shelter but need extra resources. The job is 25 hrs/week so perfect with the part-time work model I wanted to develop for myself. This way, I will have space and time to do other things that I enjoy, giving me that well-rounded lifestyle I have been hoping for.
Wishing all I love a Happy Valentine's Day!
Monday, February 9, 2015
My first 10 before 40 fully completed
I wrote in a previous post that I chose to abbreviate one of my goals for before 40 and attended a short, not a full weekend, retreat. Thanks to the generosity of my family for my birthday, and the generosity of my mentor and retreat leader providing a scholarship, I was able to attend the Courage and Renewal Winter Retreat at the Franciscan Retreat Center in Colorado Springs. I got there on Friday and left Sunday, and in between experienced some amazing realizations, transformations, heart openings, and met really interesting people. I am going to leave it at that and say no more because words are often not sufficient in discussing what happens during a retreat. I will say that the deer were plentiful, the wind a metaphor I got to wrestle with, and Winter and I have developed a different relationship than before, leading to a more positive direction. I did go into a Yoga Nidra session one night and the mantra that came to me was "Experience the Moment." Not "Be in the Moment" as at that moment I felt it was too passive a statement, but "Experience" felt more alive. In the spirit of "Experiencing the Moment" I stole this exercise from a dear friend's blog and here is what I am experiencing:
Making : A lot of decisions
Cooking : Pork chops, asparagus, baguette
Drinking : La Croix peach and pear fizzy water
Reading : "Discovering your Soul Signature" by Panache Desai
Obsessing: Over my retreat experience
Looking : A little disheveled having woken from a nap
Playing : NPR
Wishing : That I could get paid to go on retreats
Enjoying : This exercise
Waiting : For the sun to set
Liking : The term "life affirming"
Wondering : How it will all play out
Loving : My family
Pondering : A poem about winter's darkness
Considering : What tomorrow will bring
Watching : Downton Abbey
Hoping : That I will like this mustard cheese I bought today
Marveling : At how good yoga makes me feel
Needing : The purple blanket my mom crocheted for me
Smelling : Like fresh laundry
Wearing : My jammies
Noticing : That laughter is healing
Knowing : That everything works out the way it is supposed to if I get out of my own way
Thinking : About my upcoming birthday
Feeling : Utter and complete gratitude
Admiring : My best friend and the courage in which she lives her life
Sorting : Through the spring wardrobe
Buying : The right amount of groceries
Getting : Hungry
Bookmarking : Warm Cookies of the Revolution
Disliking : Judging harshly
Feeling : Like "Every day above ground is a good day" (Pitbull)
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Just Missin' 'Em
A four legged is on his or her way...but it all needs to shake out just right.
In the meantime, thinking about how these sweet faces endured a lot of life change. I miss them, lots.
In the meantime, thinking about how these sweet faces endured a lot of life change. I miss them, lots.
All things cyclical...is this a sign?
It is either a small world or the connections I have made of late are meant to be. I have a new friend named Susan who was one of my MSW teachers. She is a woman of wisdom, and has developed herself into one of those people who I admire-she teaches, she leads retreats, she is thoughtful, she holds workshops, she instructs yoga, she pushes the envelope beyond her own comfort. She is an excellent communicator, always seeking clarification if need be or allowing a quiet silence if there isn't anything to say. She lost her husband about 2 years ago, and had to put her dog down this past year, so we have a few things in common.
Susan introduced me to this amazing experience called The Narrators. It is a live storytelling show one Wednesday a month at a local theater. The first best part about it is that it is free. The second best part are the stories that people tell. People from all walks of life tell stories about their lives based on a topic. Stories are poignant, funny, bring tears, come from nervous new speakers or ones comfortable in front of a microphone. It is a unique opportunity to be in a room with so much humanity and heart.
She also introduced me to another amazing experience and that is The Moth StorySlam. It happens one Friday a month, where people put their names in a bag and if chosen get up on the stage at Swallow Hill and tell a 5 minute story on the topic of the night. The story is judged and given points, the winner of each night competing against each other at the GrandSlam at the end of the year. This month's topic was Blunders and I have not laughed as hard as I did that night in a very long time.
What appears cyclical about this is it reminds me of when I completed the Toastmaster's Competent Communicator program. And actually, one of my previous Toastmaster colleagues was there at The Moth and spoke about her trip to India and losing her camera. Toastmasters got me not only comfortable to speak in public, but got me writing, actually. Before each meeting when I would give my speech I had to craft something creative, funny, compelling...anything that would move the audience to an emotion. I wrote some of my greatest pieces during Toastmasters, and they unfortunately died when my computer died (Mom, I know...I should always back everything up on a disk...). Sitting at The Moth, hearing these stories, and feeling connected through words has re-inspired me to begin writing again. The February topic is "Love Hurts" which could be funny or very sad. And honestly, the thought of standing up on a stage in front of a lot of people (these usually sell out to standing room only) is very, very scary. But who knows? Maybe meeting Susan, and getting introduced again to the art of the written and spoken word, is a cycle worth keeping going.
Susan introduced me to this amazing experience called The Narrators. It is a live storytelling show one Wednesday a month at a local theater. The first best part about it is that it is free. The second best part are the stories that people tell. People from all walks of life tell stories about their lives based on a topic. Stories are poignant, funny, bring tears, come from nervous new speakers or ones comfortable in front of a microphone. It is a unique opportunity to be in a room with so much humanity and heart.
She also introduced me to another amazing experience and that is The Moth StorySlam. It happens one Friday a month, where people put their names in a bag and if chosen get up on the stage at Swallow Hill and tell a 5 minute story on the topic of the night. The story is judged and given points, the winner of each night competing against each other at the GrandSlam at the end of the year. This month's topic was Blunders and I have not laughed as hard as I did that night in a very long time.
What appears cyclical about this is it reminds me of when I completed the Toastmaster's Competent Communicator program. And actually, one of my previous Toastmaster colleagues was there at The Moth and spoke about her trip to India and losing her camera. Toastmasters got me not only comfortable to speak in public, but got me writing, actually. Before each meeting when I would give my speech I had to craft something creative, funny, compelling...anything that would move the audience to an emotion. I wrote some of my greatest pieces during Toastmasters, and they unfortunately died when my computer died (Mom, I know...I should always back everything up on a disk...). Sitting at The Moth, hearing these stories, and feeling connected through words has re-inspired me to begin writing again. The February topic is "Love Hurts" which could be funny or very sad. And honestly, the thought of standing up on a stage in front of a lot of people (these usually sell out to standing room only) is very, very scary. But who knows? Maybe meeting Susan, and getting introduced again to the art of the written and spoken word, is a cycle worth keeping going.
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