Dream

Dream. The more I contemplate and write that word, the stranger it looks and sounds. It is one of those words, said over and over, that stops making sense after a while. The spelling starts to look weird (is it "ea" or "ee"?). What does it mean? For me, it has meant a few hours of adulterated sleep. Adulterated. "Impure, contaminated, mixed." Another one of those words that doesn't sound right after it is said over and over again. Yet, dreams and adulterated sleep have been a part of my world for the past few weeks, thus although I would like to think them strange or unforgiving, they are there. I had this dream last night that was particularly disturbing. It included a woman (who looked like Kenley on Project Runway (okay, I had just watched the episode before going to bed)) and my fate was in her hands. There was a certain "Scrooge-Ghost of Christmas Present" feel to it as I awoke at 11:45pm, gasping for air. I felt like a stranger in my home, my own bed, and got up to make sure Chester and Stanley were still there, ready to protect me. I went to bed with one eye open, waiting for midnight, and ended up falling asleep. I have had vivid dreams all week, but I can't recall the specifics of any of them. I just know I wake up, hair gone wild, makeup smeared on pillow (despite my evening facewashing), and my pajamas soaked in sweat. To what party I attend every night I will never know. Perhaps I am dreaming of you...