Mike's tree

I wish I took a picture of Mike's tree today. My mom and dad met me at the cemetery and put ornaments on the tree by Mike's grave. It looks festive enough, but simple enough, just like Mike would like it. Not a lot of pomp and circumstance, just some glitterings of gold, silver, red, blue and green. And lots and lots of love.

The cemetery has a definitive effect on me. It is always one of peace and comfort. I think it has to do with the contemplative nature of the space-the trees, the lack of people, the quiet. I often feel that it is a third home (the first-mine, the second-my parents). I go there and rarely feel sadness-I feel peaceful and meditative. Heck, I talk to Mike 7 days a week at home, in the car, at work...when I go to the cemetery it feels different, like it is is his place, his space and I get to visit and enjoy. The area where he is buried is so lovely- lots of trees and space. I also find peace in visiting his "neighbors"-a teenage boy, another man in his 30's, and others who all inhabit this same section of the cemetery. My parents and I looked at the other trees and appreciated the ornaments and other decorations. We agreed that Mike's is perfect-simple but festive for the season.

Just how I am feeling. My house is decorated the exact way I would like it. I have a lovely little tree, lights, and some decorations on the dining room table. I do have one rule of decorating-don't put stuff places I will forget about. So, I don't decorate obscurely in the bathroom, kitchen or office-I decorate in places I can see so I can easily take it down when it is time to start hoping for the spring. I have taken lessons of Mike's life I now make my own-do what is meaningful to me, not what I think other people expect. A lesson I will always carry.